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Pamela Lim
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Friday, October 17, 2008, 9:36 PM
I feeling so imprision now. Because of the coincident of illness, I'm being locked up in the house. Plans for tomorrow also cancelled. New plans, end up cancelled too. Sigh. I'm feeling so @#$#@$ now.I'm super duper fucked up with Haojie can. It's not that I want to turn down his invitation to go out or whatsoever. I already told u my reason why I can't make it. I know u want joke with me. But can you just know when's the right time when's not?! FUCKER! You're really just another nb fucker can. Why the hell would u make me sound as though I'm that bad?! I say can't go, then like as if by saying that u can make me go. Stop it lar hor. Childish freak. If people alr tell u can't make it, why force the issue man.
And ok, this is what I want to say to Haojie, but I wont say it to him. Let me just say it in my blog.
Haojie:
"I know you're a nice big brother. And i told u before everyone have a little childishness within them, just weather they show it or not. Stop showing me your childishness. I understand, but that doesn't mean I would put up with it. I don't talk to you because there isn't a topic. And then, you put the fault on me, saying im the one who started to be cold with you. But have you ever done some reflection about it? What's happening? I know you like to joke/play a around. I can play, but please, know your limits. And today, I told you I got LS since yesterday night, then you don't even bother asking me how am I, then say tomorrow will okay already. Please lar, where got people just recover only then skip the rules. And I flare up at you. I believe this isn't the 1st time. But really, I cannot take it anymore. And you always say I don't understand, then why the hell are u telling me about what happened over the weekend? You and your ex had sex. Which I'm not surprise at all. And having ex with partners is between the 2 of you. Why the fucking hell you told me? It's private and confidential sia.
I'm really sorry, if I'm at fault at times. To think of it. You seriously don't know my pattern yet. Stop thinking that I know you well or whatsoever. 'cos I don't. And let me tell you something really crude. You english really sucks. Told you to brush up. If you don't there's nothing I can do. And jess's too. I helped you to explain those messages she sent. I get what she means, but her language still sucks. I've already put it in e simplest form i can for you, yet you don't understand. And best, you dun understand you dun say. You say u understand. I hate liars. I really do.
Not saying that mine is rather good or what. But please, can you just improve on ur english, so at least i can understand u better?
Man are bastards. You belongs to one of those catergory. You just got on my nerves. If lets say, you hadn't say things like 'you dun understand', 'you dun understand me' and if you don't lie, and contradict your words, probably you won't. But too bad, you've got in because of these reasons. "
My blood really boiling now. Why did all this happen within a day?!
And this applies not only to Haojie, but everyone out there:
When I don't talk to you or be cold to you, doesn't mean i dun like you or things like that. it doesn't mean that friends have to talk to each other everyday. Why you all bother so much? Don't irritate me, I'll just leave you alone.
Simone, you asked me yesterday,
'Why I bully you, you don't treat me the way you treat your shatec friends lehs?'
I've got a answer to it now.
Your bully means teasing, and you know when's the right time when's not. And then, when I dun talk or my face is expressionless, you can tell if I'm troubled or plain boredom.
For them, their bully is backstabbing, and it's an atomic bomb type, you never know when the timer will go. And whenever I'm quiet, they assume I'm emo. They can't tell when's im really emo, and when i just prefer to be quiet.
Understand?
My blood is simmering already. Would be fine soon.